BLOND'S APPENDICITIS

A blonde has sharp pains in her side, so she goes to the hospital. The doctor examines her and says, "You have acute appendicitis."

CHAIRMAN OF THE BOARD

To surprise her husband, an executive's wife stopped by his office.

When she opened the door, she found him with his secretary sitting in his lap.

Without hesitating, her husband dictated, "And in conclusion, gentlemen,

ABC

Johnbull had just learned his ABCs and was very scared of reciting them in front of his class.
He stood in front of the class trembling and began.
"A B C D E F G H I J L K M N O Q R S T U V W X Y Z."
His teacher said,

THE BOSS

One day a man goes to a pet shop to buy a parrot. The assistant takes the man to the parrot section and asks the man to choose one. The man asks, ''How much is the yellow one?''

The assistant says, ''$2000.'' The man is shocked and asks the assistant why it's so expensive. The assistant explains, ''This parrot is a very special one. He knows typewriting and can type really fast.''

''What about the green one?'' the man asks.

The assistant says, ''He costs $5000 because he knows typewriting and can answer incoming telephone calls and takes notes.''

''What about the red one?'' the man asks.

The assistant says, ''That one's $10,000.''

The man says, ''What does HE do?''

Ben and his Father at Graduation Ceremony

Ben’s father accompanied him to his school end-of-year awards party.

As they sat watching amidst loud ovations, the beneficiaries were called to the podium for their awards.

The following conversation ensued:

Announcer: Best student in sciences, the winner is Christopher.

Father: (Applauds and eyes Ben scornfully) See correct children!

Announcer: Best student in commercial studies; the winner is Michael.

Father: (Hisses and eyes Ben) See correct children.

Announcer: Best student in Arts and the winner is Helen.

Father: (fuming with anger) See correct children!!.

And so, all the awards were presented without any going to Ben.

At the end of the event, they left and went to the car park but as his dad got ready to start the car, the engine refused to respond.

He opened the bonnet and touched a few things but his efforts did not yield any response so they resorted to pushing it. Just as they got to the exit of the school, the rickety car sparked up.

Exhausted and profusely sweating, Ben rested on the gate just as his mates were driving off with their parents in Hummer, Jeep, Sequia, Infinity, Escalade, Bentley, Lincoln Navigator, Range Rover and other exotic cars.

All of a sudden, Ben burst into laughter.

His puzzled father asked,’what’s so funny?’

Dumb dad

I told my dad today that someone got shot and died
And my dad was like, “With what?”
I wanted to reply, ‘With cutlass’, but then I remembered he is still going pay my tuition fee next year.

question of the DAY

What can 5Naira buy in your area?????????

Comment and let know what you can use the note to buy!!!

TEST

How fast can you
fill these words?
1) S _ X
2) _ _ NDOM
3) F _ _ K
4) P _ N _ S
5) PU _ S _
6) BOO _ S
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